Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
