Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
