i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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