just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Rumble strips road head = magical
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
