i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
