He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
True but thats because hes a fetus.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
