Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize
