I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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