yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
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