no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
