Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
