my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
