Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
The adults are the big ones right?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
