I wanna passion pit in your ass
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
