It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Randomize
