They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize