I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
