Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
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