He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
