I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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