my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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