well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize