i wish peter jackson would direct porn
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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