People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
This couple is walking their pig around campus
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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