I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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