It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
And then my night got REAL pukey
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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