Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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