I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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