I think i peed on brittanys purse
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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