im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
