We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Sober January is a disaster.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
