Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
She bit a glass in half.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
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