I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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