He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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