I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
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