Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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