I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
only if we run a train.
done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Randomize
