So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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