Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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