What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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