i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
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