I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
