and i looked up. we had an audience...
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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