He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
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