I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
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