Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize