I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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