i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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