new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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