I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
