drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
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